Chris taking the mouse outside. I can only do so much.
It was a normal Friday of social networking and laughing at myself. When my husband invited me to Munchies 420 to watch a friend "complete" the "Fire in the Hole Hot Wing Challenge." - I'm in. More on that (with video - did he do it?) later.
Then right down the strip mall was our friend Raylon getting a tattoo. - I'm in. More on that later.
THEN, we came home I found a mouse in our toilet. I'm NOT in.
I ran to the bathroom, without turning on the lights, I sat down, peed, wiped - and then... a whirlpool, bidet like splashing was happening. "WHAT IS GUSHING OUT OF MY BODY??" I wonder. I lean over to turn on the lights, look between my legs to find a RAT mouse creature running laps in my toilet. I scream, my husband comes running in - I'm stunned to silence. Holy, what just happened?
How do you get a mouse out of the toilet?! I know it's awful, but... we tried flushing. THAT DID NOT WORK and is not recommended. He started running like he was on a treadmill and I'm sure I saw him flicking us off at the same time. I was screaming to him, "I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY."
That's when Chris found my gardening gloves and called an OJ, claiming they didn't fit his hands. He put on his Warrior Dash hat which did help. It makes me laugh... So I bucked up for the job. He's so supportive, "Just drag and drop. Drag and drop." Here's the video of the capture.
We let him go outside by a tree. Mice like trees, right?
This isn't the first time this has happened to me. So you'd think I would check before I sit.... The first time a bullfrog the size of a bowling ball - JUMPED OUT of the toilet from between my legs and landed on the wall. In one Superman-esk like move, I was standing on the toilet. Chris ran in thinking I was being murdered and helped me down - and moved the frog outside.
This leaves one animal I haven't sat on yet. The snake. In researching for this post, I found this video - and you can be SURE, sure to the surity sure, sure, I will ALWAYS check before I sit now.
Moral of this story? Delegate your urination.
I'm committed to provide a safe and courageous place for people to play and laugh.